A few weeks ago, I posted a blog on dealing with a mental health slump. But this is a tough year. I mean, 2020 is definitely out to get us, which is why I don’t think we should wrap up the conversation on caring for our mental state too quickly.
This week, in the dystopian disaster movie that is our collective life, we here in northwest Ohio experienced some severe storm warnings. Normally, thunderstorms aren’t too alarming, but this one brought on the threat of a derecho, which is basically a long wall of powerful wind that travels with a severe storm. We had one of those back in 2012 that caused a lot of damage, so our community was definitely on edge when those notifications started blowing up our phones.
We prepared our house by tying things down outside that couldn’t be brought inside and made sure our shelter was supplied with flashlights and water bottles. Then we made pizza and waited on the storm. Not long into our dinner, my son lost it.
He cried and cried, convinced we ate our last meal, absolutely positive he’d never see his Legos again, and so sure our pets would be cast to the wind. As a mom, it broke my heart to see him so scared. My husband and I aren’t particularly afraid of storms. We’re the people who prefer to sit in lawn chairs and watch it roll over us. My storm fears these days usually come more from the homeowner perspective. “Gosh, I hope our insurance is good.” “We just bought that; I hope it doesn’t blow away.” “If this window breaks, how will I keep the bugs out?”
But seeing my boy give into his fear really made me think about the current events taking place across the country right now. And as I talked through my son’s feelings with him, the thunder rumbling outside and the winds picking up speed, I tried to remind myself how I should be applying all our talk to my everyday life.
Here’s what we came up with:
- Focus on what you can control. The weather does what it wants. There’s nothing we can do about it. Likewise, a virus, (and our government) do their own thing. We just get dragged along, which can be super frustrating. Right now, most of our lives are altered in some way. We’re afraid of losing majorly important things—like our freedoms, or even our lives. Sometimes, let’s be real here, we even blow things waaaaay out of proportion. But what we can control is how we handle it. Minimize. Minimize. Minimize. When we look at the whole picture, it’s terrifying. No wonder we feel so out of control and lost in this. Our arms only stretch so far. So, start there. Focus on what happens inside the walls of your home, where you can reach. If you go to a job, your only concern should be the next person in front of you. One thing, one person at a time.
- What you can’t control, give it to God. It’s a waste of energy to fret and worry about what the next rule that passes will be, how the virus will spread. Take it out of your hands, and put it in God’s. He may not take away the problem—because, as we know, He likes to use difficult circumstances to teach us (James 1:2-4)—but He does promise to help us through those trials and give us peace (John 16:33). And doesn’t peace sound really great right about now?
- Be brave. Wallowing is easier; let’s be honest. Giving into the fear is simpler; it’s true. But God never meant for us to live in fear (2 Timothy 1:7). You can face this storm with courage. You can handle what you’re able to handle and give up what you can’t. That’s true bravery.
*Author’s note: If your struggles go beyond what you feel capable of dealing with, or if you’re having trouble getting out of bed in the morning, please reach out to your doctor. Please reach out to a licensed counselor, a trusted friend, a pastor, me. There is no shame in needing some extra help to get through this trying time. There is no shame in needing professional help or requiring a medication to help you function a little more like your “old self.”
You’re not alone.
coffee with mommy 